finally the world will be safe again

The concept of warning labels has simultaneously frustrated and impressed me. Useful information encouraging me not to lick an iron or drink bleach has on many occasions saved me from death and life long scarring – however warning labels have also contributed a great deal to the ongoing existence of stupid people - I mean anyone that thinks that they will be able to fly simply by putting on a batman suit deserves to die and I would happily help them out by shining a big bat light into the sky and screaming for help.

So anyway it was while pondering the usefulness of warning labels that I was accosted by a number of incredibly badly dressed sub standard humans - when I started bleeding from the cornea as a result of this infliction – I thought to myself – these people should come with warning labels - to protect the innocent - and not one of those labels you can cut off – I am talking something permanent ( like the cellulite on my ass) . It was at this point I came up with the idea of branding – nothing like permanent scarring to get the message across . Yes! – I thought to myself – these people should be branded on the forehead with a big sign that says “BAD DRESSER”

At this point I started peeing down my leg with excitement at the infinite uses of the “warning brand” – “STUPID”, “UGLY” , “NOT FUNNY” , “BAD LAY“ etc and I pictured a new world where intelligent , ridiculously good looking (and not at all opinionated ) people could again roam the streets without fear (there were also rainbows and puppies and free beer in the picture )

Furthermore the beauty of the “warning brand” is that when these deluded genetic mishaps wake up in the morning and look at themselves in the mirror (if they don't spasm from the ugly ) they too will be reminded of their handicap and as such not embarrass themselves by going out in public ever again ………………….except maybe the stupid people – because they are like stupid and all – but at least the rest of the world will be warned and see them coming (and maybe aim and shoot on sight ………. or give them a job in middle management )